Clara Eats Bacon and Funions
by ferretlover111
Summary: Clara eats Toot's bacon and Foxxy's Funions and they get revenge, and Wooldoor goes with Xandr to the fair


Toot runs to the fridge excitingly yelling, "BACON BACON BACON!" When she opens the fridge she shoves all the food out of the way, and into her mouth, including the containers, but she cannot find any bacon. "Who ate my bacon, Ling Ling tell me who ate my bacon tell me who ate my bacon tell me..." Ling Ling, with an angry expression yells, "RING RING NOT CARE ABOUT FAT BITCHE'S BACON SENSE BITCH TRIED TO EAT RING RING!" A flash back to when Ling Ling was watching TV and eating a taco, Toot walks by and yells, "TACO!" She then swallows the taco, and Ling Ling. "Sì bueno!" Back to the present, Toot, angry, yells that there should be a house meeting. Captin Hero, Xandir, and Wooldoor in Hero's room hear her and respond with, "Shut your ass, we don't give a damn about your bacon Pillsburry Doughbitch!" Wooldoor, drawing himself with muscles then begins to say, "Geeze she thinks just because somebody ate her bacon she can..." the room then begins to shake and then they all fall through the floor. "Now bitches, I want a confession on who ate me bacon, NOW!" she yells with a demon voice. Spanky tries to leave by telling her that sense he's a pig, he wouldn't eat any bacon, and leaves eating a pork chop. "Yo Tooth, did you eat the Foxxy's Funions, no, you restrain yoself so I restrain myself, l8a girl I gotta meet up and fuck with Jimmy, Johnny, Shawn, Toby, Seth..." Foxxy says as ahe walks off. "Now we just have you five, and I have ways of making you talk. She then farts, repeatedly, and the housemates yell and scream in aggony. Wooldoor's head implodes. Clara, crying, finally cracks and tells Toot, "OKAY I DID IT, I snuck into a synagog and ate the entire bag, to show the Jews that pork isn't the end of the world!" Toot has a blank expression then joyously says that she isn't mad at her and she is glad Clara confessed. "Tootie Tootie Toot Toot Tootie Tootie Toot Toot!" She yells as she walks off.

[intro]

"Now, the Foxxy thinks that Toon's little bacon rant was getting on my nerves, this is the last straw, and the last one where Lang Lang ate her Uncle Ben was just unpleasant..." Foxxy said in the communal, as a cut away came showing Ling Ling killing a black and white man, and Toot only getting to eat a foot, and the three grains of rice left. "Look Tooth, you have gotta get yo anga under control or something bad will... WHO ATE THE FOXXY'S FUNIONS!?" Foxxy said to Toot while grabbing a bag of fritos from the pantry. "Well Foxxy, let's just watch the vhs's I have of all the housemates." Toot said. "You have vhs tapes of all of us?" Toot baintly says, "Yea, is that weird?" "Yea bitch... nobody uses vhs anymore, get with the tomes and show me tha tape!" Foxxy said as they went into the living room. They watch a tape and see:

Captain Hero on the phone flirting with Wonder Woman.

Ling Ling picking out kittens with a pair of chopsticks.

Xandr on the phone pretending to be Wonder Woman.

Clara creepily pretending Prince Charming is proposing, using Funions as rings, then eating them, then crying.

CLARA! That racist white bitch who has a face talk out piss under her dress, I'm gonna getchya!" Foxxy yelled as Toot got an evil look on her face

"Hey Xandr, we should hang out, we don't get to hang much, and now that Captain Hero is spending all his time on the phone, now we can go to the fair!" Wooldoor said to Xandir while Xandr was in a noose. "Okay Wooldoor, we'll go when I wake up." Xandr said and as he blacked out he thought to himself, "Oh fuck me..."

The scene goes to Clara, Toot, and Foxxy watching TV. Toot turns the channel to a latino woman rapping, wearing a Star of David, and kissing a white girl, and Clara faints.

The scene changes to Wooldoor and Xandr on a very scary and dangerous ride, it was about to start, and Wooldoor was freaking out. "Hey don't worry Wool, I'll stay here and..." Xandr said until his phone interupted him, "Oh hold on," Xandr gets off the ride then the ride starts and Wooldoor flies out.

Clara wakes up handcuffed in the basement. "Wha, what's going on, am I in the Muslim couple's house's basement across the street?" Foxxy, Toot, amd Ling Ling walk up to her

with weapons. "Eat any bacon much, bitch!?" Toot said as she and Foxxy explain to Clara that they are going to torture her for eating their food. "AAAHHHHHHH... wait, what is Ling Ling doing in here?" "RING RING HOMISIDAL ASIAN MONSTER, RING RING WANT TO WATCH PRETTY GIRL GET HURT." he explained. "Now Clara, let's see ya eat my Funions with only nine fingas...!" Foxxy said as she clipped her lift middle finger off. "AAHHHH... hey, that's what I use to flip off my servants, dicknuts." Clara exclaimed. "Hey Clara, your hair must have taken years to grow, too bad it's gonna come off...!" Toot said as she yanked Clara's pony tail off and eats the finger. "HHAAHHH... great, now I look like a lesbian, now how am I gonna get into heaven!?"

Wooldoor in a leg cast, and Xandr walk into the tent where cows can be milked. "Ouh Xandr, let me milk her, I wanna drink something to help these pain oills go down!" Wooldoor said as he swallowed a pill the size of a taco. "Um, okay..." he said while thinking, "Oh great, smelly cows and Wooldoor, I knew I shoukd have went with Spanky." we then see Spanky in the other barn with the pigs watching the piglits feed. "Man, I can't believe I gave this life up, boob milk and free shitting, I'VE WASTED MY LIFE!" he said as he ripped his clothes off and jumps in yhe mud. "Never mind" he said while watching Wooldoor milk very fast. "Um Wooldoor, I don't think she llikes that very..." he began till his phone rang and he went out to answer it. "What's that Xandr?" Wooldoor asked as the cow poops on then kicks him out of the barn.

Toot yanked out Clara's bottom row of teeth and Clara yelled, "AAHHH... ugh, cut it out tubby, I need those for my high class meals, nutsack." Ya mean like the Foxxy's funions, now ya know the Foxxy eats those from both ends when she's in the mood..." Foxxy said as she ran off and ran back with crumbs falling from her thong, then clips Clara's nipples off with nail clippers. "AAHHHAAHH... hey, these boobs were a birthday present at the doctors, you ow my dad $50 dollars to pay the illegal plastic sur..." she began as Ling Ling through a shoe at her face. "THIS GREAT, LING LING LOVE SEEING CUTE CLARA DIE IN TERRIBLE WAY" Ling Ling said as Toot yanked her right arm out of its socket. "AAAHHHH... nice try, you're lucky I'm a lefty anyway, ugh." Clara said as Foxxy cutt a big hole in her torso. AAHHH... wait, where are you going Toot?" Clara asked as Toot walked off with her stomach. "I'm gonna make my own bacon, I'll be back in 27 minutes to nail your feet to the floor." Toot said as she left. "Why am I here again, oh yea..." Foxxy said as she cut part of Clara's tongue out. "AAHHH... oh, haha, vewy funny bwack giw!

Wooldoor in the confessional, "You know, I don't think Xandr's having a good time, everytime we go somewhere he leaves me to talk to somebody on his phone."

"Hey Xandr, let's try and win that badly made Ling Ling toy!" he said pointing at a Pikichu prize. "Um alright..." They walk up to a water shooter game and as Wooldoor pays for both of them Xandr's phone rings and he walks off, leaving Wooldoor to do all the work and loose. "Okay that's it, who do you keep talking too!?" Wooldoor askes as he takes Xandr's phone away and yells in it. "Oh yea, Wonder Woman only you can fuck those villans and get away with it you dirty dirty whore..." Captain Hero's voice said as Wooldoor ran away. "Aahhh swearing and sex!" he says as he runs back in to the cow barn and gets kicked through the roof again.

"Man, how are you still alive?" Toot asked. "Have you not seen this sh... AAHHHH..." Clara begins as Toot puts a drill up her uturus. "I mean we always cone back no matter what." "Oh that's it, I think she learned her lesson afta she had her eyes taken out and put in each othas sockets, let's go" Foxxy said as she walked off, with Toot and Ling Ling following. "Um, guys, hello, guys, guys!?" Clara yelled as Wooldoor fell through the roof and landed on her, crushing her. "Woopsie..." he runs away. "I hate the basturd who wrote this fucking fanfic..."

{episode ends}


End file.
